My name is Sinncere and I am 31 years old. I live in Philadelphia, PA with my husband, my sister & her husband, our five children and three dogs. Yes, very much a full house and never boring. I began this blog in order to refocus on writing. A few years ago I lost my focus and just recently realized the reason I stopped writing. I was in denial of the things that were going on around me. When I write it allows me to reflect on things in my life and the reality is when I am reflecting, I look at things for what they truly are. I did not want to put pen to paper because I feared confirming that some things just needed to change. I guess I was not committed to that change, so I stopped writing. Words have a way of coming together in a way that brings the truth out, and I was afraid of that truth. Talk about self-destruction!
From this I learned that no matter how ugly the truth is it is also liberating. So now I write and this time I pledge not to stop and let the chips fall where they may. I have awakened, I am free and no longer in denial. I wasted precious time running away from what has always been right in front of my eyes, Me!
Here is a bulleted list of facts related to me:
- I had what I though was a normal upbringing until the age of twelve…Now I know there was nothing normal about it.
- I was molested between the ages of 5-12 by both my stepfather and his brother.
- The biggest betrayal in my life came from the woman who gave me life, my mother but this experience also taught me the biggest lesson in life; forgiveness.
- I am the oldest of four children; two are half siblings that were raised by my stepfather. We did not grow up togeher and while we stay in touch, we remain quite distant.
- I was abandoned at the age of twelve and with the help, support and unconditional love from friends, their parents and strangers, I am here, living…
- I was unable to attend High School being I had no legal guardian and I refused to become a ward of the state because I heard plenty of stories about group homes.
- Not going to High School did not stop me from learning, I went to community centers to available classes, I attended and Art class, and the library was one of my favorite places to go. I always enjoyed learning. I was an honor student throughout elementary school.
- By nineteen I was married and had my son Jeremiah at the age of twenty. Within a year my husband and I were separated because I refused to raise my son in a physically abusive home.
- I learned the word Family is not exclusive to blood relatives. I have been treated better by strangers than by some of those blood relatives.
- At 22 I was raped & sodomized.
- At 25 I was overlooked for a promotion due to not having a High School Diploma. I promised this would never be an issue again. A trip to Barnes & Noble and thirty days of studying the GED guide led to me getting my GED diploma. In June of 05′ I enrolled in college online because I was working fulltime. I wanted to balance both because I did not want to lose a chance at moving up the corporate ladder. That came to a halt in September 2005, my brother committed suicide leaving a two year old son and month old twins. I have been blessed with the task of raising his children alongside their mother, whom I refer to as my sister because we have become that close.
- In 2008 I felt ready to return to school and did just that. I enrolled in college and am currently under three months from graduating with my Bachelor’s degree.
- Writing has allowed me to put my troubles in perspective. It has allowed me to learn and grow as a person. Writing has been my emotional support forever because it is my release.
- On June 23, 2012 I graduated college with a Bachelor’s in Business Administration
So here I am world, flaws and all,